...according to an unknown source:
1. Seiko Wallet advertisement
Jingle: “Seiko, Seiko wallet.
Ang wallet na ma-swerte.
Balat nito ay ji-nu-wine.
International pa ang mga design.
Ang wallet ng maswerte.
Seiko, Seiko wallet.”
Ang wallet na ma-swerte.
Balat nito ay ji-nu-wine.
International pa ang mga design.
Ang wallet ng maswerte.
Seiko, Seiko wallet.”
2. Family Toothpaste advertisement. Featuring some creepy American nuclear family bobbing their heads while brushing their teeth.
Jingle: “Father, mother, brother, sister
How’d you brush your teeth
A family for everyone
Keeps you smiling all the time.”
How’d you brush your teeth
A family for everyone
Keeps you smiling all the time.”
3. Caronia advertisement. Featuring four Sepia-colored hoochie-mamas dancing to the tune of “Caa-ro-nia… Ca-ro-nia…” And this is the part where my memory goes hazy: "Brings out the woman. Woman in you. Just like a rainbow. Colors that glow..."
4. Bench advertisement. Featuring Richard Gomez when he was still tolerable.
5. Coke advertisement. Featuring a pre-pubescent Lilet and the United Colors of Benetton kids threatening us with this anthem:
“I am the future of the world.
I am the hope of the nation.
I am tomorrow’s people.
I am the new generation.
And we have a song to sing to you…”
6. Bear Brand advertisement. Featuring a doting grandfather with a malignant-looking mole.
“I remember yesterday.
The world was so young.
Fun times with grandma.
Sharing moments.
Is that you Lolo?
Look at my mole.
A yeah!”
7. Jollibee advertisement.
Tagline: “Mommy, nawawala si Jennifer!”
8. Cindy’s Fastfood Chain advertisement.
Jingle: “When you’re hungry.
Cindy’s is the place to be.
Burgers. French fries. Fried chicken.
Chicken barbecue! Palabok and spaghetti.
When you’re hungry. Cindy’s is the place to be.”
Cindy’s is the place to be.
Burgers. French fries. Fried chicken.
Chicken barbecue! Palabok and spaghetti.
When you’re hungry. Cindy’s is the place to be.”
9. Family Rubbing Alcohol advertisement.
Tagline: “Di lang pampamilya! Pangisports pa!”
10. 680 Home Appliances advertisement. Featuring midgets hidden inside a large balikbayan box.
11. YC Bikini Brief advertisement. This may have watered the seeds of homosexuality in me:
“Y.C. Bikini Briefs.
For the man who packs a wallop!
Y.C. spells comfort,
Y.C. spells fashion,
Y.C. sets beauty in motion,
Y.C. is for you!
Y.C. Bikini Briefs.
Y.C. Bikini Briefs.
Y.C. Bikini Briefs!”
12. Asahi electric fan advertisement.
“Asahi.. Cools so well
Asahi.. Light as breeze
Asahi.. Makes you feel alright.
Turn, turn on an Asahi fan (2x)
Asahi!”
13. Encarnacion Bechaves advertisement. “When you care enough to send the very best.”
14. R.A. Homevision advertisement. Remember E.T.’s hand pushing that betamax player?
15. Purefoods hotdog advertisement.
Tagline: “Goodbye Carlo!”
16. San Miguel Beer featuring Rachel Lobangco.
Jingle: “Ssh-Boom, Ssh-Boom. Lalalalalalalala!...”
17. Milo advertisement. Featuring Bea Lucero doing splits and other acrobatic, de-virginizing movements. Lea Salonga sings the jingle, which goes:
“I’m getting ready, getting ready..
Oh what a day it’s gonna be..”
18. United American Tiki Tiki advertisement.
“United American Tiki Tiki
(something.. something) ni baby
United American Tiki Tiki
Tiki Tiki for baby!”
19. Government Infomercials featuring L.A. Lopez’s high-pitched voice scraping your ear drums with:
“Iodized salt! Iodized salt! Mag-Iodized salt tayo!”
“TKO! TKO! Tubig! Kubeta! Oresol!”
20. Finally, Palmolive Soap advertisement. Featuring Alice Dixson and the Holograms.
Tagline: “I can feel it!”